A Matter of Moments
by Axisor
Summary: It's a simple story about someone wanting to be more than just a friend... It's a bad summary--I admit but the fic is really good--please R


_Hi everyone. I know it's been a REALLY long time since I posted last and I wouldn't be surprised if I dropped off everyone's fanfiction radar but yes, here is a new fic from me. It is a nice little one shot fic, right? Well Please leave me a note telling me how you liked it and remember I own nothing in respect to anything that you could sue me over. I'm a poor college student._

_Remember to R&R too please._

_--Axi :þ_

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**A Matter of Moments...**

By Axisor

She casually flipped her light golden-yellow hair over her shoulder and narrowed her shining honey-brown eyes. Her dainty red tongue began to peek through her lush pink lips and slowly slipped from one side of her mouth to the other. Her pale left hand absently came up to play with the jewel of her necklace... her slender white fingers leisurely moved the pendant from side to side as she concentrated on the scroll she was reading.

Or at least that was what anyone else would have seen.

Anyone else wouldn't have realized that her hair only falls in front of her shoulders when she is upset, particularly when she wants to hide the fact that she is crying. While she was not crying, she sat on the verge of having two small rivers flood down her tight cheeks and converge into a single waterfall at her chin... While she was on the verge of this occurring, she firmly kept her composure and the tears were staying welled-up in her eyes making them have that brilliant shine as the light reflected in the moisture.

No one else would have realized that her tongue had come out to re-moisten the lips that she held so firmly together that they were just pink, and not the pink-red color they normally were. Nor would anyone else have known that it was only because the lips were dry enough to stick together that her clenched jaw had been forced to relax far enough for the teeth to part the small distance necessary so even the tip of the tongue could pass.

She raised her left hand, not her right, because if someone snuck up on her without her realizing, she would rather destroy the scroll than break the chain of that necklace. She only allowed herself to play with the necklace when she was deep in her memories... when she was no longer aware enough in the present to stop herself from showing such a weakness to onlookers. Truth be told, she wasn't even reading the scroll anymore. She had to have read it over twenty times by now.

It was the report on her brother's last mission—the one that went horribly wrong. It detailed the objectives, the potential means of achieving those objectives, and the horrible fatal injuries sustained when some unknown factor blew up.

I had a copy of it myself, and even I knew that if there had been medical treatment at the beginning, the group wouldn't have been slowed to half their speed as they raced through the forest back to camp. Their handicap allowed the enemy to attack and slaughter the team. She, or any other medical-nin, could have saved the boy and his team, but she still was debating what she could do with this piece of information. The irony that Tsunade could have saved her brother killed her. That was quite obvious, as was the fact that she wasn't going to allow his death be meaningless.

I was there when she heard the awful news. Seeing her... seeing her that upset... it tugged at something inside that I hadn't felt that strong before. It was similar to when my students conquered a challenging jutsu but... all the pride in it was replaced with pain. It hurt me so much I just... I wanted to wrap my arms around her and protect her, even if she would have just punched me hard enough to break my ribs or smacked me hard enough to dislocate my jaw.

That day, I did as much as she would allow me to as a friend but today... Today that feeling was even more forceful than before, which doesn't seem possible but.... I've trained with the hot-headed Sannin for so long and I know her so well that I can honestly say she's more than just a friend... but I don't know which direction that feeling goes in...

I asked her out, once, a long time ago and it was partly on a dare and partly because my hormonally charged body liked how hers was developing. She told me, "Not possible. I refuse." I'll never forget that line. It stung. I went out that night and started my writing career too. Scrolls are the safest place to ask a girl out—and I knew if I made enough money I could get any female I wanted.

My research is paying off now and it won't be long until I can start publishing under my name instead of my pseudonym, Ero Sensei, because I'll be established enough to write mature novels with plots I will be proud to call my own. If I wanted some big boob-ed blonde, I soon could get one anytime I wanted, but part of me wants more than just any big boob-ed blonde... I want to have someone that will be willing to be with me because of me and not my checkbook.

I know Tsunade, but I want to know her better.... It maybe as a Love or it may be just as a brother but... I know I have the feelings I should have had when I first asked her and maybe that will make all the difference. Maybe if I tell her that I have this feeling and prove to her that I'm willing to give her space until she wants to be my only source for inspiration... maybe then it will be possible, and if not... I'll settle to be just a brother to her. At least I still will be able to be there for her when she needs someone and help put some sort of ease to this feeling in my chest.

I'll ask her tonight after the meeting with Hokage to discuss mission improvements.

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Sandaime asked me to talk with him for a few minutes after the meeting. He wanted to know about the progress of my young blonde student and asked me to bring him to one of our Sannin-level training session that Snake-bite, Tsunade, and I have with our old sensei. The whole meeting took maybe five minutes and then I was quickly out the door of the meeting hall to catch up with Tsunade.

I had it planned out. I was first going to congratulate her on her excellent idea of putting a medical-nin on each team and see if she was going to take on medic-nin's where Oro and I had taken genin. Then try to lead the conversation towards the training session Sensei had asked for as well as other small matters of chitchat. All the while I would treat her with respect and courtesy and once we reach out destination, I would see if I could be invited in to her home. Either way, I plan to ask her my question with all the seriousness and heart-felt emotions as such a question rightfully deserves. I would tell her about this feeling deep inside and ask her to consider it carefully. Hopefully, then I will wait patiently for her answer in that safe environment of her home where she doesn't have to play any roles she doesn't want to and where no one can judge her for her answer.

I was just about ready to yell to get her attention when I noticed that that Dan-fellow, the one who had seconded her idea, was walking with her. It was the most genuine life I had seen in her since the dreadful news had been given and I knew.... I knew he would win her heart.

With a sigh, I resigned myself to the role of being just a brother for Tsunade. Dan looked like he would make her happy, at least for a little while and that's what Tsunade really needs right now. As long as she's happy... it'll be easier to stay in the brother role, and then I can still be there for her when she isn't happy. For now, though, I think I want to find that blonde twit student of mine and a good sake stand... or maybe I'll go to the baths....


End file.
